If your husband goes to jail, your family will face a series of immediate and long-term challenges involving communication, finances, and the legal system itself. This moment can feel like the world is crashing down around you, leaving you with a storm of questions and a deep sense of uncertainty.
The path forward can seem impossible to see, but taking one small step at a time can regain control and navigate what lies ahead for you and your family.
The shock and fear are completely normal. One moment, life is proceeding as usual, and the next, you are thrust into a world of legal terms, collect calls, and difficult conversations.
You are likely worried about your children, your home, your job, and your husband’s well-being. Knowing what to do next helps ease the chaos.
Your First Steps After an Arrest
Before you can think about the long term, you need to handle the immediate aftermath of an arrest. The first 24 to 48 hours are often the most confusing.
Here are a few initial actions to consider:
- Confirm His Location: Your first task is to find out exactly where he is being held. This could be a city police station or a county detention center. You can usually find this information by calling the non-emergency line of the law enforcement agency that made the arrest.
- Gather Important Information: Try to collect as much information as possible. This includes your husband's full name and date of birth, the date and time of the arrest, and, if possible, the name of the arresting officer or a case number.
- Understand the Initial Charges: Find out what the specific charges are. This will give you a better understanding of the situation's seriousness and what legal steps might follow.
This initial phase is about fact-finding. The more information you have, the better equipped you will be to make decisions. Avoid making assumptions or letting fear fill in the blanks. Focus on what you can confirm and control in these early hours.
The Legal Process
The legal system can feel like a foreign country with its own language and rules. What happens if my husband goes to jail legally depends on a process that starts moving the moment he is arrested. Getting a basic grasp of this process can help reduce anxiety and uncertainty.
The Initial Appearance and Bail
Your husband will have an initial court appearance shortly after an arrest, usually within 24 to 72 hours. A judge will review the charges and decide on the conditions for his release while the case is ongoing. This is where the topic of bail comes in.
- What is Bail? Bail is an amount of money paid to the court to ensure that a person will return for their future court dates. It is not a punishment, but a security deposit.
- How is Bail Determined? A judge considers several factors when setting bail, including the severity of the alleged crime, your husband's past criminal record, and whether he is considered a flight risk or a danger to the community.
- Paying Bail: If bail is set, you may have the option to pay the full amount directly to the court or work with a bail bond agent. An agent typically charges a non-refundable fee, often around 10% of the total bail amount.
Finding the Right Legal Representation
One of the most critical steps you will take is securing legal representation for your husband. Under the Sixth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, every person accused of a crime has the right to an attorney.
Your husband has two primary options for legal counsel:
- Public Defender: If you cannot afford a private attorney, the court will appoint a public defender to represent your husband. Public defenders are government-employed lawyers who handle cases for indigent defendants.
- Private Attorney: You can also choose to hire a private criminal defense attorney. These attorneys work for a law firm or for themselves and are paid directly by you or your family.
The choice of legal representation is a personal one. The most important thing is that your husband has a legal advocate who can protect his rights, challenge the prosecution's case, and work toward a favorable outcome.
How to Stay Connected While He is in Jail
Communication is a lifeline when your husband is in jail. It provides emotional support for both of you and helps you coordinate on practical matters. However, communicating with someone in custody is not as simple as picking up the phone.
Jails have very strict rules you will need to learn and follow.
Here is what you can generally expect:
- Phone Calls: Your husband will not be able to receive incoming calls. He can only make outgoing calls, which are often collect calls or paid for through a pre-funded account that you set up. Be aware that nearly all phone calls are recorded and monitored by jail staff.
- Visitation: Most jails allow for visitation, but the rules are rigid. You will likely need to schedule visits in advance, and they may be conducted through a video screen or a glass partition. There will be a strict dress code and rules about what you can bring with you.
- Mail: Sending letters can be a powerful way to stay connected. However, all mail, except for privileged communication with an attorney, will be opened and inspected for contraband before it is delivered.
Avoid discussing the details of his case over the phone or in letters, as the prosecution could potentially use these communications against him.
Protecting Your Family's Financial Stability
When a spouse goes to jail, the financial impact can be immediate and devastating, especially if your husband was the primary earner. You are now facing not only emotional stress but also a potential financial crisis.
Taking proactive steps to manage your household finances is essential for your family’s survival and well-being.
Creating a Crisis Budget
The first step is to understand your new financial reality. This means creating a crisis budget that reflects your current income and prioritizes essential spending.
- List All Income: Write down all sources of income you have now that your husband is not contributing. This includes your own salary, any government assistance, or other forms of revenue.
- Identify Essential Expenses: Make a list of your family’s absolute must-pay bills. These include your mortgage or rent, utility bills (electric, water, gas), car payments, insurance, and groceries.
- Cut Non-Essential Spending: Go through your bank statements and identify all non-essential expenses that can be temporarily cut. These could include streaming services, gym memberships, dining out, and other entertainment costs.
This process can be painful, but it gives you control over where your money is going and helps you stretch every dollar as far as possible.
Talking to Your Kids About What’s Happening
Explaining this situation to your children is one of the most heartbreaking and difficult tasks you will face. What happens if my husband goes to jail is a question that deeply affects them, and they will look to you for safety and reassurance.
Your approach should be guided by honesty, love, and consistency.
- Be Honest (Age-Appropriately): Tell your children the truth in a way they can understand. For a young child, you might say, "Daddy broke a rule and has to be away to sort things out for a while." For teenagers, you can provide more details while avoiding frightening them.
- Reassure Them of Your Love: Emphasize that this situation is not their fault and that both of you love them very much. Reassure them that you are there to keep them safe.
- Maintain Routines: Children thrive on routine. As much as possible, stick to your regular schedules for school, meals, and bedtime. This creates a sense of normalcy and security in a chaotic time.
Consider reaching out for additional support for your children, such as a school counselor or a family therapist. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) offers resources that can help families facing stressful situations.
FAQ
What is the difference between jail and prison?
Jails are typically run by local or county governments and are used to hold people who have been arrested and are awaiting trial, or those convicted of misdemeanors with sentences of one year or less.
Am I at risk of losing our house if my husband is in jail?
You will not lose your home simply because your husband is incarcerated. However, if his absence leads to a loss of income and you can no longer make your mortgage payments, you could face foreclosure. This is why creating a crisis budget and exploring financial assistance options is so important.
What is a plea bargain?
A plea bargain is an agreement between the defendant and the prosecutor. In exchange for the defendant pleading guilty to a charge, the prosecutor may agree to recommend a lighter sentence or reduce the severity of the charges. Most criminal cases are resolved through plea bargains rather than going to a full trial.
Can my husband work or earn money while he is in jail?
Some jails have work programs that allow inmates to earn very little money for performing tasks like laundry or kitchen duty. However, this income is minimal and insufficient to support a family. The money is typically used for items from the jail's commissary.
How do I put money on his books for commissary?
"Putting money on his books" refers to depositing funds into your husband's inmate account. He can use this money to buy items from the jail's store, known as the commissary, such as snacks, toiletries, and writing materials. Each jail has its own system for deposits, which may include online payments, using a kiosk in the jail lobby, or mailing a money order.
Will my husband’s employer find out about his arrest?
It is very likely his employer will find out, especially if he misses work without notice. An arrest is a matter of public record, and if the case is covered by local news, his name could be published. Depending on his employer’s policies and the nature of the charges, he may be at risk of losing his job.
Building a Path Forward for Your Family
The journey you are on is one of the most challenging a family can endure. The questions of what happens if my husband goes to jail will continue to evolve as the case progresses. Remember to be kind to yourself during this process.
You are managing an emotional and logistical crisis, and it is okay to feel overwhelmed. Lean on your friends and family support system, and do not be afraid to ask for help.
Speaking with a trusted Fort Lauderdale Criminal Defense Lawyer can make a major difference during this time. If you need to discuss your husband's case and understand your options, you can call them at (754) 206-6200 for a supportive and confidential conversation.